In LoVe with LoVe

Have you been in love..

What it’s like? How would you describe the feeling of being in love?
Does it mean you have to be a dreamer, always dreaming away in a far away land..
Does it mean you have to be in a relationship if I asked “have you been in love”

Can’t it be that “I love books, I love food, I love not being involved with someone, I love to dance, I love to talk and importantly I'm in love with love…(too many that I need to stop) and so forth instead of literally being involved in an actual relationship.

I was in a relationship previously and it’s past. The phase of my life has passed on like a moving cloud.

But I have always considered myself to be a romantic and I used to think why is that?

For a simple reason that I love to cherish every moment of life as it is, even while I was in and out of love (relationship technically speaking) as well. Because love and the feel of it just did not seize to mesmerize me.

I’m not shy neither am I naïve to confess, as it was one of the beautiful time/phase of my life and it will always remain the same, even though there was a downfall to it.

Not that it was perfect all the time (if it was I guess I would not be alone now).

I mean how can it be? Cause life is just not perfect in anyway. Is it? We want it to be perfect but want and what it is actually is two different things all together.

There are always ups and downs, like a wild, exhilarating roller coaster ride that one regrets it the moment they sit in. it’s like the most challenging turn or slide or whatever you may call it.

The urge that pushes us to sit in it makes us enjoy the thrill and the excitement of the ride because it makes you feel consummate.

I love to read and constantly get myself a romance based novels at most occasions during my visit to the bookstore. My mom doesn’t fancy it at all, so I do not show what I get most often to her, saving my ears from her.

My twin falls is at the same ground as my mom and does not even look at the books I buy. In fact she has not read any of it thus far. Unless she did it with out my knowledge, Unlikely!!!!

(See that’s a very evident diversity we have for a twin. Two babies’ that shared my moms womb for 9 months. And we are different in many ways).

During my recent visit (I make it a point to do it, every 2/3 months once), I spent quite a hefty ($$$) for the transaction, not to mention the time moving from 1 rack to another searching for books. My legs were screaming and it was not cooperating at all.

I walked out with 5 books, out of 4 which are from my favorite authors. And it was romance novel *tadddaaaa*.

I just enjoy watching love/romance based Movies too. The recent one I enjoyed the most The Vow. It was nice. It was a very light, feel good movie moment.

Because I’m so in love with idea of love, I like to seize every opportunity as it comes. But I’m just not sure if I’m ready to be in love as yet with someone cause that idea still freaks me.

Recently someone was attempting/ trying to take me out.. What’s the term called. Im not sure. Anyways, I liked him we met in a group hiking activity but it wasn’t the sort of like where you wanna go out with him on a date.

He on the other was desperately trying (which was what the whole problem was) to ask me out but not in a suitable way. I’m just not sure how that should be done, but the way he did just didn’t feel good.

So I had to tell him off, that I’m not ready for relationship and do not have any intention for it at the moment as well. It’s not like I hate the lovey doveyy thing. I don’t think I can ever fall out of love but it’s just that I’m so in love with love it self that the idea of sharing it with someone does not seem desirable to me at this juncture of my life.

Is that possible?

I only understood this, after telling him about it. I could not understand or even come to agree with it but that’s what I want, I need and I’m having it for myself for the time being.

Just because I love to read romance book, watch romance movies it does not mean I’m desperately looking for someone to lean on and love. I suppose I will love the one or that one person will look for me when the time is right.

Until then I will be madly, truly be in love with love itself..

16 signs that shows a house is haunted -Quite interesting

I'm not sure how true is this? but thought i would post to it anyways.. Because it was interesting..

You hear heavy footsteps in the upstairs hallway when you know no
one is up there. Doors slam unaccountably. Commonly used items
disappear and reappear without cause. The kitchen light turns on by
itself. There's the unmistakable scent of a strange perfume in the
air.
These may be indications that your house is haunted. True hauntings
are rare occurrences, and it may be difficult to determine whether
or not any strange phenomena you are experiencing in your home might
be due to a haunting. For one thing, no one really knows what
a "real" haunting is - what causes it or why it starts. There are
many theories, of course, which we have discussed in this space in
the article "Ghosts: What Are They?" But if you think your house may
really be haunted, what can you do about it?


The Signs of a Haunting


The first step is to determine, as best you can, whether or not you
truly have a legitimate case of a haunting.


Not all hauntings are alike, and they may exhibit a variety of
phenomena. Some hauntings feature a single phenomenon - such as a
particular door slamming shut that occurs repeatedly - while others
consist of many different phenomena, ranging from odd noises to full-
blown apparitions.
Here's a partial list of phenomena that might indicate that your
house is haunted:


Unexplained noises - footsteps; knocks, banging, rapping; scratching
sounds; sounds of something being dropped. Sometimes these noises
can be subtle and other times they can be quite loud.
Doors, cabinets and cupboards opening and closing - most often,
these phenomena are not seen directly. The experiencer either hears
the distinct sounds of the doors opening and closing (homeowners get
to know quite well the distinctive sounds their houses make) or the
experiencer will return to a room to find a door open or closed when
they are certain that it was left in the opposite position.
Sometimes furniture, like kitchen chairs, are perceived to have been
moved. Very rarely will the experiencer actually witness the
phenomenon taking place.
Lights turning off and on - likewise, these events are seldom seen
actually occurring, but the lights are switched on or off when the
experiencer knows they were not left that way. This can also happen
with TVs, radios and other electrically powered items.
Items disappearing and reappearing - this phenomenon, which we have
dubbed "the DOPler Effect" (DOP = Disappearing Object Phenomenon),
has been examined in the article "The DOPler Effect." Others have
called this "the borrowers" phenomenon, and it's the familiar
experience of not being able to find a regularly used item - say,
your set of car keys - which you believe you placed in a spot you
routinely place them. But they're gone and you look high and low for
them with no success. Some time later, the keys are found - in
exactly the place you normally put them. It's as if the object was
borrowed by someone or something for a short time, then returned.
Sometimes they are not returned for days or even weeks, but when
they are, it's in an obvious place that could not have been missed
by even a casual search.
Unexplained shadows - the sighting of fleeting shapes and shadows,
usually seen out of the corner of the eye. This phenomenon has also
been discussed in some detail in "Shadow People." Many times, the
shadows have vaguely human forms, while other times they are less
distinguishable or smaller.
Strange animal behavior - a dog, cat or other pet behaves strangely.
Dogs may bark at something unseen, cower without apparent reason or
refuse to enter a room they normally do. Cats may seem to
be "watching" something cross a room. Animals have sharper senses
than humans, and many researchers think their psychic abilities
might be more finely tuned also. (See "Animals and Ghosts" )
Feelings of being watched - this is not an uncommon feeling and can
be attributed to many things, but it could have a paranormal source
if the feeling consistently occurs in a particular part of the house
at a particular time.
Those are some of the most common experiences of those who think
their houses are haunted. Yet even stranger things can happen...


Stronger Evidence
The following phenomena are more rare, but could be stronger
evidence of a haunting:


Mild psychokinetic phenomena - hearing a door open or close is one
thing. Actually seeing it happen is quite another. Similarly,
actually seeing a light go on or off by itself is greater proof that
something unexplained is happening. Do you see the TV or radio turn
on? Or perhaps you're present when a child's powered toy begins to
operate on its own. Doors and windows are locked or unlocked. Some
people report that when they are in bed they can feel and/or hear
something sitting on the bed.
Feelings of being touched - the feeling of being watched is one
thing, and actually feeling like you are being touched is quite
another.


Some people feel something brush past them, something touching their
hair or "a hand" on the shoulder. Some feel a gentle poke, push or
nudge.
Cries and whispers - on occasion, muffled voices, whispering and
crying can be heard. Sometimes it's music from some unknown source.
People hear their names being said. This phenomenon, as is true for
the one above, gains more credibility if more than one person hears
or sees the same thing at the same time.
Cold or hot spots - cold spots are classic haunting symptoms, but
any instance of a noticeable variance in temperature without a
discernable cause could be evidence.
Unexplained smells - the distinct fragrance of a perfume or cologne
that you do not have in your house. This phenomenon comes and goes
without any apparent cause and may accompany other phenomena, such
as shadows, voices or psychokinetic phenomena. Foul odors can happen
in the same way.
Rarer still are more extreme phenomena, some of which have been
called poltergeist phenomena, and can be quite strong evidence of a
true haunting:


Moving or levitating objects (severe psychokinetic phenomena) -
dinner plates sliding across the table; pictures flying off walls;
doors slamming shut with great force; furniture sliding across the
floor.
Physical assault - scratches, slaps and hard shoves. This kind of
personal assault is extremely rare, but obviously highly disturbing.
Other physical evidence - unexplained writing on paper or walls;
handprints and footprints.
Apparitions - physical manifestation of a spirit or entity. These
phenomena are also very rare and can take many forms: human-shaped
mists or forming mists of some indistinguishable shape; transparent
human forms that disappear quickly; and most rarely, human forms
that look as real and solid as any living person, but that disappear
into a room or even while being viewed.


Rule Out Rational Explanations
A person who has experienced some of these phenomena might have
cause to believe that his or her house is haunted. But maybe not. In
fact, according to most experts, probably not. The human mind and
human senses (as any magician will tell you) are easily fooled. And
people can often mistake explainable (if unusual) occurrences in
their homes for the paranormal.


Before you decide there's a ghost in your house or move out from
fear, do your best to find rational explanations for what you are
experiencing. Virtually all of the phenomena listed on the previous
page could have perfectly natural causes:


noises could be house settling, plumbing or even vermin such as mice
and squirrels
opening and closing doors could be faulty hinges or caused by drafts
DOPler phenomena could just be carelessness and forgetfulness
shadows could be just that - shadows caused, perhaps, by a passing
car's headlights
as real as some of these things might seem to you, they really could
be just products of your imagination
Of course, the more extreme the phenomena, the harder they are to
dismiss.


And, as noted above, if multiple witnesses experience the same
phenomena, they are likely to be taken more seriously.
Get help in finding rational explanations for the phenomena. A
plumber might help you find the cause of that banging. A carpenter
can fix that door from closing on its own. A friend or neighbor
might be able to look at your particular experience in a different
way and offer a reasonable explanation for your "haunting" that you
might not have though of. In short, make every possible effort to
prove that your house is not haunted.


Keep A Journal


If you feel you have ruled out rational explanations for the
phenomena that are taking place in your house, and they are still
occurring on a more or less regular basis, document them. Keep a
journal of the phenomena as they happen. For example:


June 2, 2002; 10:30 p.m. - Was sitting watch TV when the bathroom
light switched on by itself. Went in and turned it off again.
June 10, 2002; 9:14 p.m. - Was in the kitchen and heard the
footsteps crossing the upstairs hallway again. No one was up there.
Went up to investigate and could find no cause.
A journal such as this could help with any formal investigation of
the phenomena by experts.


If you hear unexplained noises, attempt to record them with a
portable tape recorder. If there are physical phenomena of any kind,
photograph or videotape them. Keep your journal, recording and
camera equipment readily available so you can document the phenomena
as it happens.


Call the Experts


When should you call a paranormal investigator? Only when you have
ruled out any rational explanations for the phenomena you are
experiencing and are thoroughly convinced that your house is truly
haunted should you contact the experts. Of course, if the phenomena
are extreme and you feel that you and your family are in any kind of
physical or psychological danger, you should call for help right
away.


Who are the experts? There are hundreds of paranormal investigation
organizations across the U.S. and Canada. You can find a state-by-
state listing of many of them here, although I cannot vouch for the
expertise of any of them. Most certainly, they vary in expertise and
in the degree of their practical experience, so you should be
careful in your choice. Troy Taylor, in his article "What Do To When
Your House is Haunted," provides some very good advice for choosing
paranormal investigators, including the qualities they should have
and specific questions you should ask them before inviting them to
check out your home.


Despite whatever strangeness you are experiencing, your house
probably is not haunted. But if it is, perhaps it is a benign spirit
or phenomenon that you can live with. Usually, it is something you
need not fear.

Dreams...what are they???

I'm not certain how one perceives Dream.


A brief explanation from the web in Wikipedia says the below...

Dreams are successions of images, ideas, emotions, and sensations that occur involuntarily in the mind during certain stages of sleep. To read more, refer to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dream...

This is merely a subject to read and believe or is it experiencing it to believe?? What do you think?

But I mean how does one believe it by experiencing it? It is a very subjective matter, if you ask me...Right?

But I would certainly agree that it plays an imperative part in our life. Wouldn't you?
There is many, absolutely many reference based on my "Google" look up recently.. And yeah there was also a short write up in Yahoo website as well. Read on. (it’s like they knew I needed a tip on the subject. Thanks Yahoo! http://health.yahoo.net/experts/dayinhealth/dream-mysteries-decoded

The reference to this article is related with proof and description of actual events depicting the correlation of dreams in our daily life. It’s fascinating because when you think you are an idiot in a way, the Internet comes as a survival kit because it has abundance of information especially for dummies like me...

Apart from today, I remember "googling" for reference once when I was quite puzzled over a dream I had one night. It was so surreal and vivid that it actually gave me goose bumps.
It was about maggot infesting my surrounding and they were all over me and my surrounding.. Gross right, unimaginable.. I know! I woke up with sweat and a total eerie feeling.
Like my body is full of dirt and I had to immediately take shower at the middle of the wee hours of morning, about 4 or 5am to wash off the feeling of it from me.
Only after a while did it struck me that I'm actually dreaming...when I woke up with an uproar in my head.

Based on my reference reading (which I can’t remember clearly- I have poor memory at times), the dream refers to uncertainty of events happening in one's life that causes many commotion at a certain time emotionally without us being aware of it. It happens in our unconsciously.

It actually refers to emotional roller coaster one is going through in their life that it is transitioned in their dream telling them CHILL!!.. Something to that effect.
Many of times, some say they cannot re-call of dreaming at all (I know of only one person who said that, and I still doubt the legitimacy of the matter and many other things he/she says). He/She refers of not dreaming at all at any point of time in the entire lifetime. How could that be? Is that possible, I’m not sure? Even if it is I can never trust the source for the matter, well that is a different story entirely.

For some they would have and will be able to describe in explicit details about their dreams and it would linger to them forever.
Well there are some for me as well, which I can remember like forever and ever...Is it because I choose to remember it. I'm not sure as well... is there any logic behind this? Please enlighten me...

Well to be precise on my reason to put up this blog is, out of the usual practice I had my short afternoon nap during the weekend and all I had when I woke up is fear with uneasiness over a dream.

It hardly happens to me because I’m not the sort who gets nightmares and goes running to someone for consoling... I cannot recall of such things happening to me... not that I’m trying to be the macho type but I’m more of the practical type and seriously can’t remember of such events.

Anyways the dream was related to me directly and the first part of it was actually a very uncomfortable one. It goes like this, I'm losing my teeth one by one, it sort of falling off from my gums while I’m brushing my teeth. I was chagrin of it. How will I smile, how will I show my face to my friends and family, and what will I do? Where is the best doctor for me to get this fixed?
Can you believe it? I can remember it from my dream!
Oh Yes I can remember, beauty is priceless and the fear of losing it can be unnerving. Especially if it’s losing the precious little teeth.

Following it I was in a temple and I was sleeping (in my dream mind it). And I’m dreaming in it while I’m sleeping or was it I’m having a premonition, can’t recall which is which now? (I learned the word from the famous series Charmed. The famous Halliwell Sisters who had witchcraft power where they could slay vampires, demons, warlocks & etc with their super natural powers with the aid of the Book of Shadows). I was a devoted fan of these series.

How I wish it was real and we all had the privilege to this.

Anyways, coming back to my dream @aka premonition, I was screaming over something that happened to someone in my family, I can’t remember who it is now. And I woke up to a little tap on my shoulder by my nephew.

It was very bizarre to wake up thinking I was actually dreaming in my dream.

I could not grasp why and what such dream meant but it gave me a very restless feeling whenever I think of it. I’m not the kind to be affected by such things, yet it did..

Happy Fathers Day..

At 6am, when i struggle out of bed to get ready to school, he is already sweating himself in our kitchen preparing the breakfast meals to sell with my mom. Then when we leave to school and he will still be doing the chores of packing the food to carry it with him. That's how he used to feed us by earning extra income..

While I'm quite active in sports activity in school i never failed to have an ardent fan in the school field. he will be carrying his motorcycle helmet and walk his way down to the field to see us play the game.
my friends loved to see him as he was a great support to all of us..

I remember another moment, when I've already started college and as usual, did not do so well in one of my semesters and failed a paper.
The only lecture i got from him was, a hug and encouraging word telling me not to worry. things will get better, do your best the next time.
The struggles i used to see him encounter was countless and the effort and hard work he used to put to see us successful is enormous. i could never count the numbers of times I've seen him tire.

There was a time my mom gave me cash of 500 to give my dad to pay rent for our store. i lost the money along the way and i was very worried and torn between fear because of what my dad would say. and as well guilt of not being careful and getting scolded. Because my dad has short temper and sometimes it is unpredictable why and what he would have to say for my carelessness. Least did i know what would to expect.
a hug and soothing word calming my sobs telling me money can be earned do not worry my sweetie.. 
like the above, there is countless moments in my life that i can think of the best times I've had with my dad. i try to cherish each and every one of them.
Because he never ceased to surprise us, as we grew with his unspoken strength and determination to give us the best. His will power to fight each day as it comes with extreme perseverance.
He was and is my hero at any time.... i miss him a lot but I'm sure he is watching us peacefully knowing he has made all of us to be who we are now.. Happy Fathers Day..

THE MOST DANGEROUS PLACE TO BE A GIRL

Can a baby, be such a burden? When they are just a new born girl?

Human being has evolved into magnificent creatures with magnanimous creations in this world.

Yet a small thing such as "gender" makes it a predicament for the parents to not keep unborn child under their care for simple reason - It’s a GIRL.
Of all the places it’s happening in India.

I cannot stomach the thought. The land which is so rich in culture, value and one of the first civilizations proven existed in the world is declared as "THE MOST DANGEROUS PLACE TO BE A GIRL". Can you believe it. Shame on them...

Refer to the below link today’s news in CNN.

http://www.cnn.com/2012/06/14/world/asia/india-female-infanticide/index.html?hpt=wo_c2
I'm not born in India, but I'm an Indian born and raised in Malaysia and been thought to accept the one and only INDIA to be my motherland no matter what.

Still I’m perplexed and astounded in the ignorance shown by this unworthy piece of trash (the father of the child).

He should be man slaughtered…..

No. Probably he should be sent away to a land where there is no survival means, where he will die of hunger and left alone with no family with him.
I just could not fathom or even digest the thought he had brutally tortured a 3months old baby.

Where are we actually....

Late Night Supper that cost more than it should

I came across this article in the e-newspaper this morning and felt it should be spoken about.

http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2012/6/6/nation/11422568&sec=nation.

My mom is pretty conservative when it comes to late night outings. She was never in favor of it at any point of time in my life. (Even tough I’m all so grown up). I still have to be back home the latest by 12am (even that is late for her) and as a good daughter I try to honor her request almost all the time (which means I tend to ignore her at times).

This will then create a silent cold war between her and me, probably that will last till the next morning/afternoon. I can’t stand a day without talking to her.

While I sulk over the fact that she is still so backward on her mindset with no inclination of the trend and lifestyle, I do not show her my feelings or say anything to upset her on it. As I have too much of a respect with her way of life and believes.

But I must say I do have my share of gallivanting at late night while she is out of town (which lately she's been doing on a very favorable number of times for herself-I’m more than happy she is able to do it). I’ll go clubbing, watch movies or probably late night coffee or tea (is a very common thing for us in Malaysia) and for late night supper too at the hawker stalls or the most commonly known "Mama stalls" which mostly owned by the Indian Muslims minority with their famous Briyani's, Roti Canai, Teh Tarik, Nasi Lemak and etc.

Then again I always thought my mom do have a point on her believe and she is right because sleeping late and waking up late does leave you tired and lethargic at times.

And please note at her age she is phenomenally early in the mornings and please note exceptionally very early at some point.

*Which I just lack the practice.

For me staying up late and sleeping in past the regular hours is like an indulgence for my hard work throughout the week and she will never deprive me on it unless yes there is a special need for it.

Most importantly her reason for not accepting the late night outings is due to security concerns. She will be too worried that she will be awake and waiting till I’m back home.

Well now that I read the article in the attached news link, I think that what she worries is a rightful maternal feeling for her as a mother and has more meaning rather than an outdated and unfashionable mom of the era.

She always has a point in it and I could not agree the least of her believes.

Some might say it was just an unlucky day for the guys who got robbed based on what happened to them (from the article) but I think (and my mom would say this) that it was their own doing for creating an opportunity for an undesired invitation to an unwanted company at the late night.

“Well hell who asked you to stay up so late outside your house, when you know there are things happening all around. Don’t you read newspapers to learn from the lesson of others”. Probably that’s how my mother would have sounded to me if I had related the news to her. So I knew better NOT to open my mouth..